Fat lot of use

‘Super-sized’ Easter eggs are a risk to health because of the amount of sugar they contain, according to campaigners.

Apparently, youngsters could do ‘real damage’ if they eat a whole one in a day.

So who are these so-called campaigners? The National Obesity Forum, for one, which has warned that giant Easter eggs are a ‘real risk to our health’ in light of NHS recommendations that children aged seven to 10 should have no more than 24g of sugar a day, while adults should have a maximum of 30g.

The Royal Society for Public Health has waded in too, with a warning that prominent Easter eggs in every shop are an ‘unnecessary temptation’. It also whines that retailers are driving consumer temptation by selling chocolate goodies far too early.

Far easier to blame retailers than parents, huh?

But back to the National Obesity Forum. What the heck is that? A quick Google search revealed it to be a charity formed in 2000 with the remit of ‘raising awareness of obesity in the UK and promoting the ways in which it can be addressed’.

Not quite sure how to break it to them, but we’re all pretty aware of the obesity epidemic. And for those who aren’t, just take a stroll down to your nearest town centre (for maximum impact, go in the summer).

The Forum also ‘promotes ways in which obesity can be tackled’.

Seeing as adult obesity has risen from 15% in 1993 to 26% in 2016, and in 2017 the UK was declared the most obese country in western Europe, it appears not to be doing its job particularly well.

I therefore suggest we bring a new product to market to highlight the apparent usefulness of this organisation.

Chocolate teapots.

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